Eleni Aroni PsyT & Coach



Aggression is in the limelight nowadays and provides a huge opportunity to reconsider the value system that we adapt in our micro-world, if we have a suspicion that there is relevance between the outer world and the inner world, where the inner world precedes and manifests as the outer world.

I hold my self jointly responsible for the aggression of our times, since my value system is not completely coordinated with non violence. I might contribute a grain of sand of aggression and have to revisit my value system and remove that grain of sand from my inner world.

I hope to inspire other human beings to do the same, so that some generations after, it would be impossible to manifest that size of aggression in the outer world, since the reserves of aggression in humans will have disappeared.

Aggression is built in the ego system, that focus totally at the “I, me, mine” whenever a condition of conflict arises.

Marshall Rosenberg teaches that there is an alternative way for the human nature. According to this aspect, we are not simply our stories. These stories, he writes, are fictional, self created and they remain unchanged out of habit, collective manipulation, old conditioning and lack of self awareness. Even the best stories contribute to violence.

If you want to use power to protect your family, protect yourself from an attack, fight against the wrong, or engage to what is called the “right war” then you have been seduced by the sirens of violence. If again you choose to refrain from something like that, there is a serious possibility that society will turn against you and will punish you. In other words it is not easy to find an exit strategy from all that.

Ahimsa (Sanskrit: अहिंसा, IAST: ahiṃsā, lit. ‘nonviolence’) is an ancient Indian principle of nonviolence which applies to all the living beings. It is a key virtue in the Dhārmic religions: Jainism, Buddhism, and Hinduism.

Ahimsa is one of the cardinal virtues of Jainism, where it is first of the Pancha Mahavrata. It is also the first of the five precepts of Buddhism. Ahimsa is a multidimensional  concept, inspired by the premise that all living beings have the spark of the divine spiritual energy; therefore, to hurt another being is to hurt oneself. Ahimsa has also been related to the notion that any violence has karmic consequences.

For a human being, Ahimsa is attained through the process of expanding consciousness beyond the ego, beyond our self. Otherwise we stay in a fatal circle of peace and war both in ourselves and in our outer world.

Expansion of consciousness begins in  us. We have a mind that can learn to use logic. We have a heart that can learn to handle emotions. When our mind and our heart are in conflict, we ought to learn how to find a solution that will honour Ahimsa, to refrain from hurting either our heart or our mind.

Resolving our inner conflicts through compassion and understanding, we care for our inner environment, we expand our consciousness and we liberate ourselves.

In our mind we hear messages that are full of judgements, accusations, anger or fear for us or the others. All these messages feed violence. We need to learn how to encourage ourselves to focus on what we really want instead of what is wrong in others or in ourselves. We need to learn how to transform these messages and liberate ourselves from the influence of the violent inner dialogue that is blocking us to realise what are our needs or the others needs. Of course that transformation will not eliminate the practical challenges but will guide us to perceive them and do the right thing for us and the others, through patience and a deeper understanding of our needs and our emotions.

If we choose to expand our consciousness until we find the attitude that is for the good both of our mind and our heart, if we choose not to rush into picking a side or give up, if we pull back from our impulses and our opinions, listen carefully to our thoughts and calm our heart till logic and emotion ally with each other, an alliance will occur. That alliance will embrace both emotions and thoughts and will manifest an attitude that is called Ahimsa – non violence.

Then and only then our stand is the right one, not only for us but for the others. Through that process our thoughts expand and we acquire access to the Spiritual Intelligence innate to all beings, our heart expands and we acquire access to the Spiritual Wisdom.

Do we human beings  prefer to cultivate grains of aggression, through our egos or grains of Highest Wisdom and Brilliant Intelligence through our Devine Spark?

Reference: Non Violent Communication, the language of the heart Marshall Rosenberg

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